Laura Gonzalez Marin
I want to start with thanking my CrossFit Soul family for all of the support and being a part of my journey.
I have gone from struggling with body image issues and eating disorders to competing at the CrossFit Games Regionals and now The CrossFit Games; Something I couldn’t imagine possible just a couple of years ago.
I started dieting as a new year resolution and being “all in” to things (as I always am), I did everything I read on the internet to a T and really lost myself throughout the process. What started as a diet without guidance or knowledge turned into using weight loss to deal with the stress of the sudden changes in my life, because it felt like the only thing I could control. Even when I had long passed my goal weight I just wanted to see the number on the scale keep going down and when it would stop I would cut down the amount of food I would allow myself to eat. I dreaded doing anything out of my routine that would put me in situations where there was food or social eating situations and I would hide how little I ate. I remember having a food log journal, and at first, it was normal but then I kept it a secret. I also punished myself with exercise. My entire life I was the typical tomboy, always active and played every sport you can imagine, and through this I found myself hating to workout but making myself do it to not be “fat”. My weight dropped to 90lbs and I was all bones. I remember that sitting down would hurt because all I sat on was bones. My rib cage was visible, I was always cold, had mood swings, felt sad, felt anger, dizziness, and lied. It’s all a big blur.
The road to recovery was long, hard, and really bumpy with many ups and downs. I went from under-eating to binging and purging, and eventually, it got so out of control that I would pass out before purging the food I had binged on. One day, I walked into a CrossFit gym to try a class and I immediately fell in love. It kicked my butt and I loved it. I stopped worrying about what I looked like and became focused on becoming stronger and fitter. I wanted to fuel my performance, and the moment I let go of the scale, everything started to get better. More and more days went by and I stopped feeling guilt and shame whenever I ate. I started competing in the sport, actually enjoying life again and training a lot because I wanted to reach my goals, not just punishment for being “fat”.
I decided I wanted to make it to Regionals and started training at Soul, qualifying in 2017 and 2018. This year, we are going to THE CROSSFIT GAMES!
It’s awesome being around so many people that have an incredible work ethic, dedication, and passion for fitness.
The Soul gym floor truly is my happy place. I am immensely grateful for the coaches, friends, and FAMILY I have at Soul and every experience we have shared the last few years: sweats, laughter, tears, successes, failures, everything.